Justin Bieber...Secret Nazi?

Yep...I'm attacking Justin Bieber. I know, the whole world wide blog-o-sphere is doing the same thing...but come on--no one has the balls to say the truth.

I'm ignorant, by the way, so please remember that.

Does Bieber have one parent or two? Are they still married?

I'd like to know NOW--that way I know who to BLAME when BIEBER pulls a COREY and drops dead of an overdose.

LONG STORY SHORT--BIEBER IS INTERVIEWED & DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THE WORD GERMAN MEANS.

What an asshole.

Look, I've read his TWAT. Or TWEET. Or whatever it's called when someone uses TWITTER as a damn press release.

He CLAIMS that he thought he was being asked about "JEWMAN" and not GERMAN.

"JEWMAN?"

"JEW-MAN?!"

You think Mel Gibson was salivating at that one?

Justin Bieber, who looks like a Beaver--which is funny as hell to me, is a child star for absolutely no reason. My sister in-law (who's 11) has a huge crush on him. Every time I see his mug I want to make sure my sons turn out the exact opposite.

Wait...where am I going with this.

Oh yeah, BEAVER IS AN ASSHOLE. And I mean asshole in the sense that he has no idea how stupid he is.

The fault lies in his parents.

Hold on, let me look up if this mutant's parents situation.

Yep...parents are divorced.

Guess what--now it's their fault even more than I thought it was.

God damn leaches.

Get it now, get it on, before its gone...Let’s everybody carry on, carrying on...Turn it up, set it off, before its gone!

Pearl Jam…live in St. Louis…May 4^th, 2010.

All I can say is that I’ve never, ever been in the middle of a situation and actually thought, “Oh my God! This is better then I could have ever dreamed.”

That changed.

Last night.

And that was only 2 songs into Pearl Jam’s set.

So many thoughts, words, emotions…let’s just strip (hot) to the essentials:

The band is 20 years old.

The guys in Pearl Jam are in their mid to late 40’s.

It’s 2010…not 1993.

I’m in my 30’s and I took my 10 year old son.

Given those facts, honestly, I figured I would have a good time and maybe, just maybe, Avery Elvis would not be totally bored.

Let me set the stage for you…

Avery has seen ONE concert before this. Just one. Toby Keith. No sh#t. I always fantasized that I would take him to his first concert, like my dad did with me. In some selfish ways I actually thought that maybe I would be performing his first concert—with my band Vallium. I tried to spark up a charity reunion show—but the guys from the group are too busy playing in ‘bar/cover bands’ to humor the idea.

I got to the venue with Avery right about the time the opening band, BAND OF HORSES, hit the stage. My thoughts on them? They had a very cool slide show play on the backdrop behind them.

Yeah, that's pretty much it.

Even though Avery had already "kind of" been to a concert before (I'm going to try and not mention Toby Keith anymore in this review) he has never had a concert t-shirt. Well damn it, that was going to change.

So, during half of BAND OF HORSES, we went looking for a perfect concert t-shirt. (See the photo at the top to check out our selection)

After the shirt selection, Avery really wanted to put it on. (this is a part of the evening that really made me laugh) We went to the men's room. Avery hit a stall and I walked up to a jon for a quick whiz. It was a men's room at a rock concert. Guys will know what the room looked and smelled like without me having to set the scene for you. Avery ran up next to me, while I was trying to whiz, and he said, a little too loudly, "Dad! Some of these guys brought booze in here!"

I did a quick glance around at some of the guys and they all gave me a look that told me they thought my son's reaction was pretty 'cute' and funny. So, being a good dad, I looked at Avery and said, "Yeah, I know. Wow. Well, did your dad get booze?"

"No."

"Well then, that's all you need to know, son. Let's check out that shirt."

Avery's face lit up like a firecracker when he caught a glance of himself in the mirror.

Around all of the guys at the sinks Avery let out a loud, "Woooh!" He clapped his hands together and said, "Let's do it, dad!"

Even if Pearl Jam decided to cancel--at that moment--I was on cloud 9.

The concert took forever to start. I didn't time it...but at the very least, it seemed like an hour between BAND OF HORSES and PEARL JAM.

But then it happened. The house lights went out. The crowd screamed. Avery jumped up, almost knocking my jaw off, and one of the greatest evenings of my life started to kick into overdrive.

I'm not sure if I should go song by song...telling you the best bits here and there...I'll post the full set-list, but maybe it's best to just give you a review that you can only get from me. (that means I'll contradict the hell out of any intentions I've laid out and there will be no logical flow to this entire post)

They started the show with SOMETIMES. First track off of "No Code." Avery had made me promise to tell him the names of the songs, because he knew he wouldn't recognize all of them.

Ten seconds into SOMETIMES...this guy...this ex-frat-boy beer-gut jock, in the row in front of us, hits his friend and says, "Oh yeah, man! This is off of their new album!"

Avery was looking at them and I noticed he nodded.

No.

No, no, no.

I leaned in, with the over-bearing stench of Issey Miyake choking my lungs--yeah, I said it. Issey Miyake sucks. It's worn mostly by douche bags.

I said, "Sorry, sport. This song is about 14 years old. It's called SOMETIMES."

I moved back over and saw Avery give me a big smile.

Nice.

The energy from the stage could be felt throughout the entire venue. It was like The St. Louis Blues were in the Stanley Cup Playoffs--game 7--and the whole show was the bottom 5 minutes of the third period...Blues up by 1.

I'm serious, it was beyond electric.

A great highlight, before I continue, has to be...THE REEFER. Yes, there were people smoking pot. Sorry, kids, hate to expose that one.

Was I?

What are you, stoned?! Of course not. I was there with my son, you degenerate!

But the moment I dreaded did happen. About 3 songs in...Avery looked at me and said, "Dad, people are smoking!"

"I know, son. I told you they would."

"Yeah, but dad, are they smoking cigars? It doesn't smell like cigarettes!"

"Avery, shhh, don't get weird, but have you ever heard of pot?"

"Pot?"

"Yeah, son...weed?"

"WEED?! DAD, THEY'RE DOING WEED!? WE COULD ALL GO TO JAIL! IT'S ILLEGAL!"

It was, hands down, the greatest I have every seen or heard Pearl Jam--EVER. Better than the infamous live broadcast of Atlanta Georgia in '94. Better than every St. Louis performance I've caught personally.

This is going to sound lame...but I felt like I was 16 again. When I saw Pearl Jam back in 2000 and 2003 I thought, "Well, they are getting older...maybe they can't move like they used to...the 90's are over, after all."

Last night? I didn't think that ONCE. (although I would have liked to have heard ONCE)

In 2000 they played 26 songs.

In 2003 they played 25 songs.

(Yeah, I'm a huge geek)

Last night? We got 27 songs. HOW COOL IS THAT?!

Okay, I can't hold back...I'm just going to go FULL-ON SUPER FAN and go song by song.

1. Sometimes--faster than on the album and Vedder growle d and screamed the build up at the end, giving me chills and setting the pace for what is already being called, by the band, "The Sleeper in St. Louis." (Seriously, that is what Stone Gossard cal led the show, backstage, after they wrapped)
2. Corduroy--I used to love this song...then I got tired of it...when they first started in I kind of rolled my eyes...but something happened--this version (find the bootleg) is the best rendition of Corduroy I have ever heard.

   

3. All Night--This is a b-side (the dumbass ex-jock in front of me thought it was from their second album, VS) can be found on the 2-disc "Lost Dogs" release. Never intended for release as a single or even an album cut...but damn, what a great song to set the pace for us and them having "All Night!"
4. Do The Evolution--This is Avery's favorite Pearl Jam song. From the first howl of Eddie on the mic, my son was standing on his seat, pumping his fist in the air (he's only 10!) and singing along.
5. Why Go--Great way to get the whole crowd to sing al ong. Hearing this song, played the way they did last night, made me think back to the first time my Dad put the needle on the record of "Ten" and told me, with a straight face, "Joe, this will change how you hear music for the rest of your life."
6. Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town--I thought it was an odd place to put this song in their set-list. But when the lights go bright and everyone screams, "HELLO!" you can't help but get lifted up.
7. In Hiding--In 1998 I had $2.00 to my name. I was living in my friend's basement. Working 40 hours a month on FM radio. Chasing a dream and coming up short. The album "Yield" had recently come out. One night, I'll never forget, I put this song on repe at. I laid on the basement floor and dreamed. Dreamed of any life that brought me a feeling of success and completion. While singing along to this song I looked to my right and saw my son. I swear, I almost cried. It was beautiful.
8. Even Flow--I knew they would play it...I never look forward to it...but Avery looked at me and said, "Dad, the guitar guy is playing it better than on Guit ar Hero! " (EVEN FLOW was on Guitar Hero 3)

   

9. Unthought Known--New song off of "Backspacer." It sounds like the sister to WISHLIST. I had my fingers crossed for it to blend into WISHLIST. Instead, they played the "Riot Act" track:
10. Save You--Not a bad song, but it wasn't the greatest track the group ever produced...I was also hoping Avery wouldn't realize that Eddie was saying the "F" word about 30 times during that performance.
11. Down--If this song would have been on "Riot Act" and not been shelved as a b-side I, personally, believe the album would have done much better. "You can' t be neutral on a moving train...one day the symptoms fade, think I'll throw these pills away..."
12. Pilate--WOW! PILATE?! Seriously?! A song that makes their album, "Yield," even more unique and accomplished. Never heard it live. Now I want to hea r it every day.
13. Severed Hand--Eddie said that this was a "drug song." Then he reminded us all that, "Not all drugs are good...some are great."
14. Not For You--When I think of the way I get treated for my radio show, HIPP NIGHTS, I think of this song a s my anthem. Never heard a bad version of it. Last night was no different.
15. Glorified G--I really wanted to hear SATAN' S BED. I thought there was a chance. I never thought that I'd be lucky enough to hear this! Stone Gossard was on fire last night.
16. 1/2 Full--If you can't get RED MOSQUITO then you've gotta get 1/2 FULL. At least that's how I feel. Both songs are amazing jams. The changes in the vers ion they played last night are making me itch to get the bootleg immediately.

    

17. Daughter--A bit bummed that Eddie didn't do a little interpretive lyric swapping at the end...but they band made up for it with:
18. The Fixer--Yeah, yeah, I know...it's the Target song. Fine. Say what you will--but this song was so good live that I felt I was seeing the show at The Hi-Pointe (before BS politics shut it down) Intimate and raging.
    
    ENCORE 1
    

19. Inside Job--Last track off of one of their 'ballsiest' albums to date, the self titled "Pearl Jam" from 2006. A great song that sounded so sweet echoing in the rafters.
20. Just Breathe--The current LAST KISS for Pearl Jam. It's a decent song--still sounds like it should have been on the soundtrack for "INTO THE WILD," but it is, currently, the favorite Pearl Jam song of my wife. And it has the next lyric I'm getting tatto oed on my arm: "I'm a lucky man to count on both hands the ones I love."
21. Jeremy--The engineer extraordinaire of HIPP NIGHTS tells me that this is the "Radiohead Creep" for Pearl Jam. All I know is that Eddie embraced the hell out of our energy and went full-on section 8 during this number. Not a single soul wasn't singing alon g and screaming at the end.
22. Got Some--personal favorite off of the new album. Very solid rendition. In fact, it further proves to me that "Backspacer" sounds better as an album played live.
23. Rearviewmirror--I can never hear this song enough. For Avery and I it holds a special meaning. REARVIEWMIRROR was the first song Avery ever heard--ever! Leaving St. Anthony's Hospital...I got him securely strapped into the backseat...turned the radio on, and there it was, right at the beginning. REARVIEWMIRROR.
    
    ENCORE 2
    

24. Garden--If anyone paid attention to my predictions than all I need to say is, "I CALLED IT!"
25. Alive--Eddie played with the crowd on this song and, no joke, I thought he was going to jump out and crowd surf or start to scale the side of the Scott-Trade. Best moment of any concert I have ever been to happened during this performance. Avery a nd I, arms around each others shoulders, singing along word for word.
26. Baba O' Riley--No band will EVER cover THE WHO better than PEARL JAM. Quote me. Don't believe me? Then listen to them do "LOVE REIGN O'ER ME." That cover is the 2nd greatest cover of all time. (2nd only to Johnny Cash doing HURT)
27. Yellow Ledbetter--Of course. They had to close with this. And even a little flirting with the song's inspiration, LITTLE WING. Two words: "Potato Wave."
    
    

    

    
    

PEARL JAM TONIGHT!

TONIGHT...St. Louis...Avery Elvis Hipperson gets to see his FIRST PEARL JAM CONCERT!

I'm stoked.

Sure, I've seen them before...Just ask my wife how many PJ shows I've "forced her" to go and see. For the record--she only got me to leave ONE show early. That still stings...

I'm going to post a full review tomorrow.

But, to indulge my Pearl Jam love for today--and to help spread that love to some of you that might have fallen off the Jam wagon--here are the best "gateway drug" songs from each album. My way to help ease you back in.

TEN

ALIVE
Easily, the best song on the album, and the best intro song for anyone who hasn't heard of them yet.

VS

REARVIEWMIRROR
It's got a unique flow to it. The lyrics? Don't worry. If you don't get it you don't have to stress--just wait for the 3 Vedder's screaming at the end.

VITALOGY

SATAN'S BED
This is more of a personal favorite than the best "gateway drug" song for this album. Better Man is probably a better pick. But SATAN'S BED? Damn, what a cool song. "I'd stop and talk but I'm already in love."

NO CODE

HAIL HAIL
It's a very simple song. It's lyrics are some of the most beautiful--but because of the arrangement you would never know it. Best line--Are you woman enough to be my man?

YIELD

ANYTHING!!!
Any song (except the RED DOT) from this album should get you back into the Jam. Personally, I'm a sucker for NO WAY and ALL THOSE YESTERDAYS. Avery Elvis? His favorite PJ song of all time is on this album: DO THE EVOLUTION.

BINAURAL

NOTHING AS IT SEEMS
I was back and forth with this one. I picked the slow number. It's got a great guitar solo and has a vibe to it that reminds you just how powerful subtlety can be.

RIOT ACT

LOVE BOAT CAPTAIN
Okay, I'll say it...this is their worst album. But it still has some cool moments. Half of this record sounds like they're trying too hard. But LBC hits every needed note.

PEARL JAM

WORLDWIDE SUICIDE
This very well may be my favorite Pearl Jam song ever. Yeah, I love Satan's Bed. Yeah, I'm a walking contradiction...but I've NEVER turned this song off if it pops up--and Eddie's message in this song is a great "F.U." to the suspenders ruining this country.

BACKSPACER

GOT SOME
It's off to find a song that sounds better live than on the record--this song is by far the best stand out track on Backspacer--but hit youtube and watch them play it on Letterman. Brilliant.

IT'S OVER JOHNNY...IT'S OVER!

Joe Hipperson here…I’m a huge Stallone fan, so, if I get some SLY news I feel obliged to share it with you.

RAMBO is now MIA. About a year ago, while Stallone was teasing everyone with his concept for this summer’s THE EXPENDABLES, he hinted that a fifth RAMBO film would feature John J. fighting something “alien” to the franchise.

Yeah, a lot of us rolled our eyes. But, after time, I started to like the idea. Stallone vs a man in a suit-style alien/monster? The last time we saw a throw-down like that would be when Arnold turned out his best performance EVER in PREDATOR.

Sadly, I am hear to report that the idea of RAMBO coming back to the silver screen for blood, guts & carnage is dead.

Almost…

To quote the Italian Stallion himself, Stallone said, “I

think Rambo's pretty well done…I don't think there'll be any more. I'm about 99% sure.”

99% Sure?

That leaves a .01% chance!!!

The reason I bring this up is SIMPLE—If “RAMBO” was the last film in the series…well, was it good enough? I think the film was damn fun to watch. But it really reminded me (in tone) of TEARS OF THE SUN. I really wanted to see a story on American soil, with John J. Rambo, and maybe make it a throwback to how people in this country can be a greater threat than the ‘dime a dozen’ movie bad guys.

I’ll end this entry by saying that, as of right now, STALLONE CAN DO NO WRONG. You want proof? Here you go:

WHY RADIO IS LAME

Joe Hipperson here. I’ve been trying to update this blog here and there…not trying to OVER do it—that’s why you don’t get the same type of update over and over again.

On day I’ll be telling you why Jessica Simpson is an anti-woman self loving attention whore. The day after that I could be exposing my soul, showing everyone how pissed off I am at the lack of time Hipp Nights gets on St. Louis airwaves. And then there are the updates that involve my personal life.

Today?

Well, today I’m going to tell you why the radio industry drives me crazy. Don’t worry, I’m not going on a rant about my persecution. I’m no hero and I don’t deserve to be a martyr. J.C. CORCORAN?

That guy deserves your passionate resolve to fight for a way to get him (after his sweet ass contract deal expires) BACK on the local airwaves. Ya know, now that I think about it…how cool would it be to have J.C. CORCORAN & JOE HIPPERSON do a morning show together? Jesus. Talk about two polar opposites colliding. Roll your eyes all you want.

Here’s something NO ONE has figured out yet:

Given the RIGHT platform…the right time-slot…the right opportunity—I would be the most listened to talk show host in this city.

There are multiple reasons why…but that isn't the point of this blog entry.

(don't over-analyze the picture...it's just a rough draft of a tattoo I might get)

Back to my point...

I was visiting Mike Anderson's blog. www.stlmediastuff.blogspot.com . I read a post that made me remember just how backwards radio programming can be.

Here is, word for word, what was posted on Mike Anderson's site:

Hatch Research is conducting a paid market research study on Music.
Qualified individuals must be MALES, between the ages of 34 – 41 years old.
Qualified participants must listen to 96.3 K-HITS AS THEIR NUMBER #1 RADIO STATION.
Participants will receive $90 for their time and participation in this 3-hour group interview at our Maplewood, MO location.

Did you REALLY read that? How lame is THAT!? They need to run a market research study and SPEND MONEY to do so--just to figure out how to get the right programming on the radio--in order to get people to listen!?



Christ!



Here we are, in ST. LOUIS! Sure, we're not New York or LA or Chicago...but it's still a decent market for radio...right? I work in radio. You all know that. I've known SO many GREAT talk show hosts/on-air personalities that are not on the air anymore--and you want to know the #1 reason they get told as the pink slip falls into their lap?



They get told that there isn't enough money in the budget to keep them on. Not enough money? Not enough money to pay the people responsible for giving your station PERSONALITY? But they find enough money to throw at consultants and market research teams to get told what they should be doing--instead of thinking for themselves!


Ok, I know you probably think that I'm just "bitching and moaning." I'm not. Listen up, because I have solutions. Some of them I'm going to give out on this blog, for free. The others? Well I guess you'll just have to hire me to be your program director. That is, if you want a station with integrity and a station with balls.

You want to know how smart I am? I'm going to tell you. Almost EVERYONE has some form of MP3 player. That means that the music they love is always on shuffle and giving them exactly what they want: A spontaneous Soundtrack To Their Lives.



So what do they go to the RADIO for???



Personality.



The hosts. The DJ's. Whether TALK or MUSIC format--it's all personality. 10 years ago? Yeah, maybe you could get away with saying that the music was more important than the voices the audience hears--but not today. Not in the climate of 2010.



I've always hated it when radio stations hire out of town consultants who come INTO town, talk to "real people" and determine, for a HUGE FEE, the right direction the station needs to head.



Let me ask you this--WHO gets remembered more? The people that had to get their ideas from others or the innovators that make up their own minds and pick a direction--and move FORWARD--THEIR WAY.



Here's a little experiment...How many radio stations have a program director or programming staff that could listen to Frank Sinatra's "MY WAY," and not get pissed that they are complete hacks?


So my bottom line is simple--if you run a radio station and you want to find out what people want to hear--SELL YOUR STATION. Sell it. Seriously. Or hire someone full-time, not some market research team, and have that someone in a position to have the guts to give your station direction.


You want to figure out what the people like or don't like? Try something radically different in this overly soft, PC smothered society--STAND ALONE! Make your station whatever the hell YOU want.


Hell, if you are THAT powerful that you can hire consultants or market research teams then I'll bet my left nut that you have the authority to make the choice to stand on YOUR OWN IDEAS. YOUR OWN DIRECTION.


Guess what--if people tune in and LIKE IT--You now have something that no one else does! AN ORIGINAL RADIO STATION WITH INTEGRITY!

WHAT GETS ME HIGH...WHAT GETS ME BY...

This blog is very hard to label. One day I use it as an outlet to vent. Another day I hear some cool entertainment ‘buzz’ and I want to share it right away. Kind of makes me feel like Perez…only straight…and thin…and not f*cking retarded.


There have been times that I can’t hold back my feelings about the BS hero worship that infects this American nation. (for more on that please read my post on why I hate Jessica Simpson)



There are times that this blog is written by my producer and “Engineer Extraordinaire,” Josh. Sometimes we use this blog together…either to hype an up-coming radio show (and there will be more white guys at Tyler Perry movies than Hipp Nights broadcasts during the Cardinal’s season) and sometimes this blog becomes a recap of what you missed if you chose to embrace your Saturday night.



So…what am I using it for today?


I have a story to tell.


Two stories, actually.


They could be told in very poetic, drawn out ways…or I could just get straight to it.


Let’s see how well I do at just getting right to the point.


Lately I have been feeling very different. Some days I feel like me. Joe Hipperson. Other days I feel like everything I’ve accomplished in life doesn’t matter. Because, in the end—you are only the reaction that you give to those shoveling it on you. Think about it…It could be love, hate, disrespect…there are people out there that will lack the ability to open their mind to accept anything that doesn’t come from their own backward-ass chasm of a brain. Don’t let them win. Hell, they don’t even have the 2 cells needed to figure out that you are “winning by choosing to live well and not let their ignorance bother you.”



So my point is this: I f*cked up and let a couple of actions towards me get the best of me. The ignorance and disrespect shown to me caused me to react in a negative way. Soooooooooo I moped around and tried to shun myself away from anything that might make me happy.


Son of a bitch…I can’t get to the point, can I?!



Damn.



Okay…so, I was depressed.



I can really set the mood, can’t I? I was so depressed that I went out of my way to listen to Simon & Garfunkel…by candlelight. Christ.



A couple nights ago I was walking my Maltese, KC. It was a little after 11PM and the house was quiet. I did my regular ‘round the block with her and made it back to the darkened plastic house in Imperial.



I Opened the door and was about to walk down stairs to take a shower…when I heard a giggle.



Like an idiot, I looked at the dog.



Like she had just giggled at me.



After a second of feeling stupid I looked up the stairs. Out of the corner of my eye…there were the eyes of 4 year old Shawn Patrick…hiding under a blanket. I pretended that I didn’t see him and started walking up the steps. I got to the very top and said, “Shawn? Did you turn into a blanket?”



He laughed and shot up. He looked at me, very seriously, and said, “I was pretending, Dad. I’m not really a blanket. I was trying to fall asleep but my covers were messed up.”



“Shawn, it’s past eleven. It’s way past your bed time.” Shawn looked at me and held three fingers up.



“Okay, Dad. I can have these minutes? Just these minutes?”



“Okay, Shawn. I’m going to take a shower and then get my jammies on. Will you be in bed when I’m done?”



“Deal, Daddy!” So I went downstairs and jumped into the shower. Not one minute had gone by and I heard the sound of KC running around upstairs and Shawn chasing her…laughing.



After a speed shower I took a minute for depression…looking into the mirror and noticing that every wrinkle on my face equaled about 10 hairs off the top of my head.



Son of a bitch.



I went upstairs, saw that it was almost midnight—got REALLY excited that I was only going to get 5 hours of sleep—and started to look around for Shawn. He wasn’t there. Is it possible that he actually went into his bed after his “these minutes” were up? I checked his room. Nothing. I went into my room, expecting to see him lying in my spot, but all I got was the sawing of logs from Mrs. Hipperson…who was also hogging the covers. I heard a whisper.



“Daddy!” I spun around and saw Shawn at the end of the hallway. How did I miss him? What did he have in his hand? In a singsong type of voice he said, “I’ve got your special pillow!”



“Shawn, we’ve got to go to sleep…if Mom wakes up we’re dead!”



“Okay, Dad, but we just need to make your special pillow cold.”



The following 5 minutes were spent with me lifting Shawn up, while he was holding my “special” pillow, so that he could open the freezer—and insert said pillow. After the 5 minutes in the freezer, Shawn and I walked into my bedroom. He asked, “Is it okay that I sleep in Daddy’s bed? I’ll be good. Just don’t snore, Dad, and I can sleep in your bed.”



I got him tucked in. I clung to the 2 inches of bed that I had for myself and then I felt him hug me. He whispered, “I really love you, Dad.”



Here’s my other little story.



The other night I noticed that it was getting near 9:00 PM. The bedtime for my sons is 8:30. When Dad (me) is the enforcer of bedtime it means that the kids and I are usually on our second bag of popcorn by 8:30.



This night was different. My wife had put them to bed and I was on second patrol. I was the closer. I had already gone into Shawn’s room and sung him his new, favorite bedtime song, “Ring of Fire.” Yeah, I try to channel The Man In Black.



So, I had wrapped up my song and kissed Shawn goodnight when I noticed that I could hear people talking in Avery’s room.



Avery, being only 10, I doubt has developed multiple personalities…and I knew I hadn’t let anyone in the house. So, I opened the door and say Avery, lying in bed, and listening to his stereo.



Usually he has “American Idiot,” by Green Day or “LOVE,” by The Beatles in his cd player. Instead…well…it was me. Not my old band, Vallium, which he has listened to by the way—but I didn’t force him to—just in case some bastard out there thinks I’m force feeding my kids music their Dad made in a ‘wanna-be’ punk band from the ‘90’s.



No, he was listening to my talk radio show, HIPP NIGHTS.



I sometimes burn shows to CD so I can listen back to them. You know, just to hear how an interview went, or to agonize at just how much of a jackass I sound like on the air. He had taken a CD from a previous show and put it in his stereo so he could listen to it while he fell asleep.



A million emotions flooded me within seconds. I wanted to say hundreds of different phrases—all cliché and all lame. Instead I looked at him and he looked at me. We both gave each other a nod of the head…and I knew, at that moment, I was looking into the eyes of—what will one day be—a hell of a guy. He’s a brilliant child, don’t get me wrong…but, at that moment, it was almost like I could see my (future) grown-up son as a man…staring back at me and giving me an unspoken signal. A nod of the head. A way to say everything you need to without eating up time.



So as I look ahead at the astronomical number of radio shows that I WON’T HAVE over the Cardinal baseball season…I don’t hit any panic buttons.



Sure, I’d like to be on more. Hell, I’d like to be on every day. But my happiness or my success isn’t judged by it.



I won’t let anyone—anyone judge me. Not while I’m here. After I die? Sure thing. Judge your ass off. Until that day comes to pass you can count on me enjoying a life where I don’t give a rat’s ass what zip code I live in or how much money my spouse makes.



To all of those superficial people that actually have the balls to think things like that matter—I say this: I’m richer than you’ll ever be…and as long as I’m with Lashawna, Avery & Shawn—I’m in a home better than whatever your fancy ass zip code provides.